A Clusterfuck of Sports Updates

May 1, 2011 § Leave a comment

This is why I should just sit down and finish a blog when I start writing it. I started writing this Sunday afternoon and had a whole intro written that made fun of all the stupid shit being covered in the news.

Then Osama bin Laden got shot in the head, which was totally fucking awesome, but a sad byproduct is that I had to rewrite my intro. What a tragedy!

So anyway, here are my thoughts, musings and predictions on the recent sports happenings.

I’m a big fan of the Rams draft.

  • First of all, this Robert Quinn guy seems awesome. Yes, he got suspended for his senior year at UNC for getting caught up with a sketchy jewelry dealer, but honestly, who hasn’t? I bought a Jesus Chain out of a guy’s trunk near my work just last Wednesday.
  • In all seriousness, I’m not worried about Quinn missing a year of football. He stuck around with the team and still probably worked out all the time. Plus, it’s not like a defensive end requires an IQ over 140. Quinn’s job will be to rush the QB, hit the QB and possibly pick up the ball and run in the correct direction if the QB fumbles.
  • He also seems like a fantastic guy who will be great in the community. Read this story by Bryan Burwell, and you’ll know what I’m talking about.
  • His brain tumor is obviously a concern, but the doctors checked him out and said he’s good to go. I’ll take their word for it.
  • I think Quinn is going to be the next Leonard Little, hopefully minus the whole killing a woman while driving drunk. He’s just as quick and tenacious, plus he’ll have a couple of great mentors in Chris Long and James Hall. Should be exciting.

Thoughts on the rest of the Rams draft.

  • The second-round pick, TE Lance Kendricks, should provide Bradford a dangerous weapon. As the New England Patriots showed last year, athletic pass-catching TEs provide a ton of tangible and intangible value for offenses.
  • I would’ve liked to see the Rams pick an RB in either the third or fourth round instead of back to back WRs, but both guys project as big, physical guys— something the Rams haven’t had in a while — who will likely make the team. But Billy Devaney better finally invest in a reliable backup RB. A Thomas Jones type would be desirable.
  • As for the other four guys we drafted, you just hope one or two can stick — preferably one of the OLBs.

My overall feeling is that the Rams have improved on each of their drafts since the disastrous (and I mean DISASTROUS) drafts of 2006 and 2007 in which zero of the 18 players were on our 53-man roster at the end of last season. The ’08 draft certainly wasn’t spectacular, but it did provide us with a very good (and hopefully soon to be elite) DE in Chris Long, a couple of serviceable late-round LBs and special teams contributors in Chris Chamberlain and David Vobora and a decent WR in Donnie Avery. Sure it would be nice if we had drafted Desean Jackson in place of Avery, but we also could’ve done a lot worse, like Devin Thomas. The ’09 draft resulted in three starters in the first three rounds: OT Jason Smith, LB James Laurinitis and CB Bradley Fletcher. Can’t ask for much more than that except to hope Smith continues to improve and reach his potential. The ’10 draft certainly looks good so far with two future Pro-Bowlers selected with the first two picks: Bradford and OT Rodger Saffold as well as some good developmental guys, such as CB Jerome Murphy and DE George Selvie. So you’ve gotta hope Devaney and co. are continuing to get better at the draft and that the ’11 draft will be even better than last year’s. Right now, I’m a believer, but we’ll know for sure in a couple years if football ever starts up again.

NBA 2nd Round Playoff Picks

I posted these 2nd round predictions on Twitter yesterday just in case someone thought I was waiting to pick Memphis to win until the first game was complete. So I’ll repeat them here with some very quick thoughts on each series.

  • Grizzlies over Thunder in 7: Memphis is a nightmare matchup and is much more formidable than the ’07 GS Warriors, the last no. 8 Cinderella seed to win in the first round. Marc Gasol is playing better than his brother Pau right now, and Zach Randolph is the best post player in the NBA right now. OKC is gonna struggle unless Russell Westbrook completely dominates Mike Conley, which didn’t happen in game 1, and if Kevin Durant has an MJ-like series, which will be tough with defensive superstar Tony Allen draping him.
  • Celtics over Heat in 7: I don’t feel great about this pick, but I have to go with Boston because you have to believe they’ll win at least one of the four games in Miami. They’re too experienced and talented not to. And once LeBron gets back to Boston, it’s my belief that all of last year’s ugly playoff demons will rear their heads and torment him, which makes it likely that Boston will win all three at home.
  • Lakers over Mavericks in 6: Do you realize that this is the first time Dirk and Kobe have matched up in the playoffs? Weird, right? Anyway, I have LA in 6, and I probably won’t watch a single game because I don’t really like either team. Kind of like Celts-Heat actually.
  • Bulls over Hawks in 5: I can’t figure out if the Magic are that bad or if the Hawks actually played pretty well. Or maybe Atlanta just got lucky? Yep, they just got lucky. And Orlando’s not very good. Either way, Chicago should sweep them, but I’ll give Atlanta one game because of Boozer’s uncertain injury status.

Cardinals Thoughts

  • This team is entertaining as hell and might be the most talented Cards team since 2005. This team could legitimately be 22-6 and probably should be at least 20-8. But as I’ve written previously, we have a very noticeable fatal flaw. I think the only solution is to get rid of Ryan Franklin. Not that he’s a bad guy, but he’s pitching so poorly right now that he casts a black cloud over the whole team. So honestly, we should be rooting for Franklin to keep sucking so that the Cards’ hand will be forced and Franklin can be placed on waivers and fulfill his destiny as being a long-bearded lumberjack.
  • Matt Holliday will win the NL MVP.
  • Please don’t get used to this production from Lance Berkman. Just enjoy it for now.
  • Don’t worry about Albert Pujols. His numbers always end up the same. No reason they won’t again.

America Thoughts

Please for the love of God, don’t feel bad celebrating Osama bin Laden’s death. I’m very proud to be an American today. He’s a piece of shit who got what he had coming. And if you’re worried about some kind of karmic retribution for chanting U-S-A! after the announcement, then you’re an idiot. Even God is ashamed of bin Laden and will probably spit in his face when he shows up at heaven’s gates, then send him down to hell* and encourage Satan to have his way with him.

*I don’t really believe in the concept in hell, but for the worst mass-murderers (e.g. Stalin, Hitler, Mao, Osama, etc.), I’ve gotta believe there’s some kind of terrible fate awaiting them. At least I hope so.


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