OMG! It’s Snowing! WTF?

March 14, 2011 § Leave a comment

I found this by Googling "shocked snowman." Google's awesome.

To everyone in Missouri complaining about the snow, please shut the hell up. By now, most of you should know what you’re in for with regard to weather, which is (a.) unpredictability and therefore (b.) horrible meteorologists.

(I suppose (b.) could have something to do with (a.), but I’m pretty sure St. Louis’s meteorologists are especially awful and have a success rate roughly equivalent to Brendan Ryan’s 2010 batting average.)

Anyway, nobody our age should like snow at any time ever at this point, but especially in March when we are supposed to be gratefully draped with warm temperatures and spring weather. So complaining about it is redundant and makes you look roughly equivalent to someone in a volatile relationship who is surprised when her (or his!) spouse beats her (or him!) yet again, just when she (or he!) thought that spouse loved her (or him!) and would never administer a beat-down again. Like the woman (or man!) in the scenario above, you can either move or transfer schools to a warm state that surely would never have any weather problems of its own (besides, you know, tsunamis, earthquakes, thunderstorms and hurricanes) or just shut up and take what Missouri gives you.

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